Dear Didi, My parents like the girl I like, but they don’t like her family. What do you think?

Dear Rama,

The answer in one word is: Depends.

Is she is someone you’ve met a few times and you like her, but your heart isn't in too deep? Do your parents have some clear objections to her family? Well, then maybe they see something you can’t. Talk it through with them. What is the basis for their objection? Listen to their point of view and ask questions so that you can understand what the root of the issue is. Then, once you can see the objection from their point of view, give them your take on the girl. Tell them why you think she’s a good match for you. And then ask them to help you by factoring the family issue with the possibility that she’s the one that would be a great addition to your family.

If you are truly, madly deeply in love. Then it’ll be very hard to consider “issues” about her family and to discuss with your parents objections objectively. Maybe you could talk to her about it. Don’t attack her family but ask her, “How do you think our families will get along?” She probably senses that there are some possible issues. Then decide together: how are you going to tackle this together? Then reassure your parents that you understand their concerns and you agree with them, but that you’re confident that the bond you have with your partner will bring everyone closer. And really she’s so fabulous and makes you so happy that couldn’t they open their hearts to her? After all, they can give her all that she didn’t have growing up, since she was raised by wolves.

If you’ve just met someone, forget it. Listen to your parents. Move on. But if they find fault with everyone you’d like to consider — time for a sit down.